the way it sounded is he was on the bus and heard them talking sounds like grade school kids. the bad thing in this world is that everyone we meet and the things that happend to us either makes us who we are or takes away from who we were, and in your sons case the man that did this to him took away from him the child he was to become and you can't condim him for that he like your daughter was a innocent child.
get him some help to don't push him away!! I think you have misunderstood some of this by Rebelrage Thu May 12, am He wasn't molested I was as a teenager and I wanted to express that because I have got some harsh feelings toward him, I think because of my being molested and knowing what road lies ahead for my daughter.
Also I want to say that I have NEVER told my son I hate him and still tell him I love him. I understand he needs help and am requesting that the court also order it because we can't afford the kind of help he needs no regular therapists will touch this because they say he needs specialized help.
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I also believe he doesn't need to go unpunshished for this either, he can't be allowed to get away with this too, he has gotten away with so much stuff because the law wouldn't help me in more minor issues. He has not been held accountable for any of his past actions and I believe that if he was this might not have happened.
I am trying to get him help and be supportive despite my negative feelings, but at the same time I guess that I may also indirectly show him some of them. That is what is driving me crazy.
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The double feelings of love and hate, wanting to support yet write him off. I don't want to give ages, but I will say he should be in early years of high school. He definitely knew better. Thank you so much for responding when no one else seemed to want to.
I think I may need to get some counseling myself to deal with my negative feelings and I will try to show him more of the loving feelings I have for him. Thanks again.
by guest Sun May 15, pm You've already seen that the state is not interested in providing the help that you or your son or your family needs. Before this is over with you will probably see just how screwed up some situations can be.
You seem to have lots of anger toward your son.
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And this anger seems like it was there even before this molestation and that you are just using this as an attempt to get the state to control your son because you can't. None of us are there and so we can't really understand what your reasons are for feeling this way. I strongly suggest that you get counseling for yourself.
Many molestation victims go through life cutting a broad path of destruction on the others around them. Let's just hope that your son and the rest of your family are not some of those victims. to make a long story short i had to make her a ward of the statethat means u sign him over to the stated to take care of him.
sometimes for some people it is the only way. just something for u to think about as a last resort.
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you can contact dss to find out more. by Guest Mon Sep 12, am I don't see this as a police issue. This is a family therapy issue. I bet dollars to doughnuts your son is suffering from a dignosable mental illness, probable Depressive Mood Disorder.
Look it up on the Diagnostic Statistical Manual IV-Text Revised DSM IV-TR.
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He should be see by a competant child psychologist, not a cop. The lying, the stealing, the trouble at school all point to depression. If he acts out in the classroom, it might be ADHD, as well, or Bipolar Disorder, or a combination of several of them all at the same time.
This is called Co-morbid conditions, and is very common in children it's like having chickenpox and mumps at the same time. If need be, he might need to be hospitalized for a while, but he's not likely to see the inside of a hospital for more than a week or ten daysit's too expensive, even with insurance. The other problem is finding a psych hospital with a children's unit.
They aren't too common. DO NOT let anybody put him on a unit with teenagers and children mixed together. If you do, he might get worse. You need to SEE the inside of the unit before he is admitted, if they decide to admit him. Is it safe, clean, well-controlled, etc? If they won't let you tour the unit first, refuse to admit him.
Unless he is under Court ordered treatment with a Mental Health Warrant they cannot force him to be treated or you to get him treated. But they could remove the girls from your home, which would be a very bad deal. Kids removed from their home go to a foster home or a holding facility, and you have absolutely no guarantee what kind of conditions might be there, or who the foster parents might be.
I might suggest taking a trip with just your son and just talk to him, mom to son. "You know son, for a long time it was just you and me. Now we have a new family with even more people who love you. We are all concerned and want to let you know just how much we love you. I am sorry for whatever you have gone through and I understand how hard it Mom's gotta go! Thanks for the footrest. First feeding "Here is a picture of me breastfeeding my fourth child during my c-section. I was still cut open on the operating table! They were in the process of stapling me back together. I demanded that I feed my daughter as soon as she took her first breath These naked photos show moms' real postpartum bodies. If there ever was a real come-to-Jesus moment, it might be seeing your naked, postpartum body for the first time. I know it was for me when I was staring at my fleshy tummy in the brutally unforgiving lights of the hospital bathroom. It's easy to get caught up in wanting our bodies to bounce
I know several people who were sexually molested IN FOSTER HOMES while they were supposed to be getting protected from an abusive parent, sibling, etc. My best guess is that he is depressed, and needs both individual therapy, family therapy, and maybe an SSRI anti-depressant.
Ball park guess: Zoloft. It also sounds to me like you might be depressed too, which might explain why he is depressed depression is often genetic. Keep posting, let me know how things are goingI care.
Don't lose hope, miracles are possible with modern psych medications. Oh, and BTW, if Zoloft works for your son, it probably will work for you, too.
by becky Tue Sep 13, pm I am SO sorry I reach out to you with hugs and support. You are NOT a bad mother.
Congratulate, your naked mature mom son right!
I have also been molested and if anyone did this to my daughter, I would want to just kill them, I would be filled with so much rage and guilt that I somehow allowed this to happen to her.
I can understand how you feel. I HIGHLY recommend therapy for you, your daughters, your husband, and your son individually and as a family. I might suggest taking a trip with just your son and just talk to him, mom to son.
Now we have a new family with even more people who love you. We are all concerned and want to let you know just how much we love you.
I am sorry for whatever you have gone through and I understand how hard it is to talk about, so whenever you are ready to, I am here for you.
It is not your fault and I will not think for one minute it is. I dont know how old he is, but maybe you should discuss what is proper touch and what is not, and how to appropriately react to certain feelings.
Tell him that certain interaction invovles respect and love. After being abused by someone, it is learned that these actions dont include the regard of the other persons feelings.
Have your husband help teach him how to properly respect women. My daughter is only not quite four yrs old who was physically, physcologically, vebally, and emotionally abused by my brother in law and sister.
They have pretty extreme ideas on how to deal with even the littlest situations, and although was not as severe as what some children have to endure, my daughter just lashed out. I tried to get after her each time she had a behavioral issue but she only got worse. I wanted to know how I as a parent had failed her.
I was at my wits end after two months of this and started to think about all the different things that had some up since this behaviour started: nightmares, potty accidents, abuse toward younger brother, swearing, rage, fear, screaming, crying, all so extreme, all of the time. I got it back to a certain month in time and kind of figure it out. I started to ask her what her bad dreams were about and started asking her why she was afraid. I figured it out and I held her and promised her that Mommy and Daddy would never let anyone hurt her ever again.
Your son may be too old to use the same ways to get the information, a child psychologist would probably be much better. But he needs to learn how that it is ok to to have feelings, how to express those feelings in an appropriate way and needs to feel how others are feeling for him. It is easy to pass behavioral problems off as a stage they are going through, or say they have a problem and start sticking pills down their throats.
This is causing the problems, whether it be ADHD, or anything else. Facing and dealing with 1 will help to ease all the other problems. Drug intervention may be needed anyway, but I am saying dont stop there. You are filled with all these strong feelings about your son, HE is also filled with just as strong of feelings toward someone else. I feel for you and your family. by Entangled Sun Sep 18, am "My husband and I fight all the time because he thinks I should stand by him but at the same time he acts like he hates my son and scolds me when I express the same reaction my son doesn't belong to my husband.
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For your story is very vivid. It's not something that can be solved and set right in a moment?
Can you clarify, "My son doesn't belong to my husband? Is he a Bio-father. or Father figure? That makes a big difference! Many variables which makes a hard answer. The knife in the suite is an issue! Take it from me I scared my ex because I put a hand through a sliding pantry door.
Actually scared myself.
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I knew martial arts and saw this getting my hand out was worse, because hollow and did more damage trying to take it out and very hard. I had to wrap my hand up for I scratched myself more. something you must understand My mind was going wild with OCD and pressure yet, arguing and feeling trapped didn't lead to a violent encounter with her I needed an anxiety frustration reliever at the time.
A hard door took it away. Hitting my ex was so sick to me. I couldn't even imagine doing that! I needed a "punching bag" to take out frustion. I found a door!
But, I loved my ex and hurting her was terrible and horrible and nowhere near the solution? A hard substance was a reliever just like a punching bag can take out emotion. If he is frustrated and likes to swing. take a a board in the basement and nail in to the 16inch studs.
after winding a lot of rope. Take cloth and wrap it around his fists and tie it. His nuckles will be raw but the hardness is a great area to relieve anger, frustration, depression, confusion teach him to hit it. slam it! I broke my leg and arm and have a cast that goes to mid-thigh. Now I feel self-conscious in front of them. What was my mom thinking sending them in? My cousin told my step-sister to handle drying me off cause it would be too weird for her.
Should I feel as super embarrassed as I do? Vote A. I would help but it would be SUPER awkward. Vote B. Vote C. Vote D. Select age and gender to cast your vote:. Your age Girl Guy Please select your age.
Share Facebook. Fell in shower and female cousin saw me naked? Add Opinion. ksmiller 75 opinions shared on Girl's Behavior topic. Xper 6. It wouldn't have bothered me or been a big deal to me.
It's just the male anatomy. People's outlook on the situation would depend on their views of nudity and how comfortable they are with naked bodies.
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